Someone may have done you wrong and hurt you before that burden is on them. But if you continue to live with the pain and in that same moment for the rest of your life them that falls squarely on your shoulders.
Until you face the problem head-on you will continue to suffer. The Healing begins when you decide to let go of the pain and forgive the one who put you through this misery then you can move forward with your life.
And on some occasions, we have to forgive ourselves for the pain that occurs because when the madness is going on we are right there with front row seats watching like an innocent bystander as everything unfolds. The pain ends when you forgive all that involved the healing begins.